[Ed: My original idea was to post the quote here that I was ranting about for 500+ words or so. Then I couldn’t find the quote again after wasting nearly four hours looking for it. This is a nice post but not worth all that, so you get it without context. Sorry.]
Sorry, I was coasting on G+ today and found this inane thing where somebody had to preamble about how, “Love may not be for everyone, but…”
Wait? What? For one thing, if it’s not for everyone, then what IS love? First things first.
Yes, even the most deluded, narcissistic sociopath have love. They have perfect love of self. Which is really really broken once you think about it. It is love in a vacuum, where only those outside the vacuum can make sacrifice. But that sacrifice is meaningless because nothing outside the self has value. Congratulations, this is why the “self esteem” movement fails, and tends to produce either sociopaths or even people who are more broken than before. Because it is through the flaws in ourselves that we begin to know why love is necessary.
Well, least the meme people don’t think love is sweetness light and unicorns. (Hint: even unicorns aren’t fluffy tender creatures… even Bronys know that, but I digress.) Because love is a real bitch sometimes. Everybody wants it, everybody needs it, but like God it is easy to renounce when things don’t go your way. It doesn’t object and henceforth seems to lives up to your worst expectations. So, if it’s a good thing– indeed, if it’s the definition of a good thing– why does it suck so hard?
Well, first we have to stop adding to the suckage by not identifying it properly. It’s not the sum mass of feelings surrounding a sexual relationship, alone. Think about it. That would make the love of family, friends and even pizza more than a little creepy. Yet, we can start by looking at what elements of love could conceivably unite all these things.
Well, Greek has four definitions. We only have one. That is why we can love both pizza and God. I mean, really, do those responses have any relationship to each other, outside of being generically favorable? Let’s face it, love is as complicated as milk. If you think I’m being flip, ask a biochemist about what milk is really made of. There is stuff about milk we still don’t understand chemically, and you can even make plastic out of it. Oh, and cheese. The only reason why cheese is not love is that not everybody can have it.
It is a more than fondness, or even loyalty, but beyond mere feeling. Right here I’m going to dismiss “love of pizza” as a preference that verges into fondness– some times past all reason. A part of the definition of love is it’s tenacity. Love resists all opposition,– even by reality.